... said the guy who probably never had to pay condo fees.
After just over two months at "the job," my pay checks have finally started to fill up the large gaping hole of debt I've built for myself, but I remain cautiously optimistic. I've built up a lot of debt over the past few years and it's going to take me a while to bring it all down. To be honest, I'm actually seriously considering a second job in order to bring it down faster and still be able to afford my expensive acting habit. But more on that later. Right now, it just feels so surreal to look at my bank account. Like, "What do you mean I have more than $37.00 to my name?" I know this is how "normal" probably people live, but to me it still feels odd and unaccustomed.
I went out and bought my family some Christmas gifts, which I actually didn't think I'd be able to do. I recently threw out my favorite pair of jeans and some boots because I had completely worn them out and, if I wanted to, I could go out today and buy some new ones. But I'm not going to. Not yet. Though I know I am signed on to work until November of next year, part of me is too worried that if I spend that money now, there might not be any more coming in and then I'd be really screwed. And I still owe money to some very patient people, so it just doesn't feel right spending anything on myself just now.
Though I find it hard not to be involved in the arts as much as I would like to right now, I'm trying to be more focused with the ones I've got. The first draft of my English to French play translation is almost done and I've got a dramaturge ready to look at it. Just in time to apply for municipal project funding.
And hopefully I'll be able to pay off my debt in 2012 and save enough to rework and tour Roller Derby Saved My Soul across the country in 2013.
So, like I said, I'm cautiously optimistic. Now if I could just find some patience to go along with that optimism, I'd be golden.